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The Only World She’s Ever Known
To my daughter: It wasn’t like this before you were born
I’d experienced incredible joy. I’d experienced overwhelming fear. I’d never experienced both of these so intensely and at the exact same time.
“Oh, a Spring baby” they’d say. “That’ll be great for going on walks when she’s born”. My due date was April 8th, 2020 and this was a common response from anyone who learned I was pregnant.
It turns out, they were partially right. It was a great time to go on walks. Clasping a mask, crossing the street with the stroller, trying not to get too close to the neighbors.
My daughter was born on April 3rd. Only my husband was allowed into the hospital, but even that didn’t feel like a certainty in the weeks leading up to her birth. We couldn’t leave the room until it was time to go home. We saw doctors and nurses from time to time, but never for long. The answers to our questions were limited: Are kids getting sick? Could we see our parents? On April 3, 2020, no one knew much.
Our story wasn’t unique, of course. 3.6 million babies were born in the US in 2020 (or an average of 9,877 per day). In fact, our friends were down the hall from our hospital room. Their twins were born on April 2nd. We texted throughout our stay but weren’t allowed to see them.
